I Believe In Magic

“Mommy, I think I’m ready to talk to Santa this year.” Astrid says very quietly one evening after dinner when all of us still gather around the dining room table doing homework, writing, paying bills, and if you are only four years old – coloring.


“I mean, I will talk to him – but I’ll be standing next to him. Not on his lap. I don’t want to touch him. But I’ll say hi maybe and tell him my name. I want to tell him that I only want a talking scale this year just like the one in Costa Rica so it will yell out “31.2 pounds” all day every day if I want it to. I need to tell him about the scale so I get it. That’s the only thing on my list.”


“Maybe it’s a good idea for all three of you to get your Santa lists ready!” I suggest after Astrid’s announcement that she is “Santa-talk ready” this year. “I’ll make reservations for us to visit him this Saturday.


Eloise looks up from her algebra – stopping mid-problem that has something to do with coefficients and rises and runs and things I no longer understand – and says “Yeah okay Mom, let me get right on that. Ha!”


“Ha!?!” I stand and hold my hands up to my heart as if shot and take a deep breath in before responding with a “Santa is watching and he heard what you just said!”


“Oh, okay Mom. Let me just get right to that list after I finish my algebra and type-up my endangered animal study paper….”


I look to Astrid and Esther who have already gotten out plain paper, red markers and stickers and are happily making Santa Lists.


And I sit back down hard as I realize she no longer believes. And the hurt takes me by surprise.


I mean she’s 11 and all – and maybe you’re thinking “Geesh, it’s about time!” Because maybe that’s what I was thinking a few years back when at eight and nine she still did believe while I figured the whole ‘Santa’ thing out by the time I was five.


I continue to sit quietly at the table and glance over my coffee and then I meet Eloise’s eyes. She gives me a quick, small knowing smile and wink before getting back to her work.


And I cannot help from almost crying as our eyes meet because I know she gets it. Because even though she may no longer believe in the actual Big Man himself, she still gets the magic of the season and the importance to not give her new found knowledge away to her little sisters.


Later that night she hands me her Santa List – which even starts with “Dear, Santa” and ends with “Love, Eloise” – and as she hands it over to me she says “You know just in case you’d like to know what’s on my list too.”


I smile as she walks away and heads up to bed.  I carefully unfold her letter and read the first two items on her list…


-I would like to raise at least $100 to adopt a Panda from WWF to help stop their endangerment.

-I would like Astrid to get the talking scale she wants


And I know that she still believes in magic because she continues to wish for very good things.



Do you have a Holiday outfit planned for your little girl for Christmas? I was thrilled to receive the Twinkle Party Dress and matching dress for Bitty Baby from American Girl to review.  Astrid pretty much doesn’t go anywhere without her ‘Baby Anna’ and now they can match when we have breakfast with Santa this weekend. And they can ask for the scale together! In fact Astrid has refused to take her party dress off for the past three days because she feels like a ‘special princess’ and has told me that ‘Baby Anna’ will never wear anything BUT her fancy red dress. So there you go. They love their matching dresses and I about died from the cute. I think Santa will be equally impressed this weekend and now we don’t have to stress about what to wear on Christmas eve.


If you haven’t purchased your Holiday Dress yet and you have a little one who loves AG – I for sure recommend these cute sets! I am a HUGE fan of American Girl as you know – for celebrating girls and sending a positive message to our kids…so having these special dresses for Astrid and ‘Baby Anna’ is just a bit of sweet icing on the cake for us.

About Tracy

My name is Tracy Morrison and I live in sunny Minnesota. I'm neither British nor a nun - I'm just a Midwesterner with a headache. This is mainly a humor and lifestyle blog that documents the lighter side of parenting. I am an ex-corporate ladder climber turned freelance writer, social media manager, and fashion expert - and ruler of my own little universe(very small). Aren't we all. I would love for you to contact me at tracy@sellabitmum.com

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  1. says

    You’re killing me with this. Bella has a baby Maya, and I fully planned to buy her the set and then wound up going over budget on Xmas (yes, I know its only 12/5) and never got the dress, the combo is $94… but I LOVE IT… #firstworldproblems for real.

    And I cried when she said she wanted to Astrid to get her scale. So sweet.
    Marta recently posted..A Trip to the World’s Fair.

  2. says

    Crying no bawling! Sweet Eloise! Those pictures of astrid, wow. She looks so grown up in her fancy dress. Funny that she wants a scale!!! Every day she stood on that thing many times. I did not for fear of what it would say. I thought this is a strange piece of equipment in Costa Rica, is it trying to ruin my vacation! Have a fun visit to see Santa, I still believe!

  3. says

    Astrid and Anna look spectacular in their dresses! I wouldn’t take it off, either. I’m dying from the cuteness of her only wanting a talking scale. And the sweetness of this whole post. What good sisters and girls you’re bringing up.
    Greta recently posted..My #JamberryChallenge

  4. says

    I laughed at the part when Astrid asks for the scale and got tears in my eyes when Eloise asked for Astrid to get her scale.
    Our youngest stopped believing last year. It was sad, but time, I suppose. Christmas is still magical here, but in a different way.
    Shannon recently posted..Where I Lived Wednesday

  5. says

    It happened to us a couple of months ago. I’ve waited to write about it, but yeah, my 10-year-old fifth grader started dropping hints that she knew and so did my 9-year-old.

    We let them break the news to themselves before confirming it. It was bittersweet. But we live in a “everyone’s on the same page” house now.

    I’ll miss the staying up late putting stuff together and tracking santy claus on norad but I’ll dig the extra sleep and easier shopping.

    This was beautifully written
    Lance recently posted..100 Word Song – Nearly Lost You

  6. Tina Mutscheller says

    you have the sweetest most caring girl I know! I love her & wish she could hang out with MY girls so her huge heart could rub off! <3

  7. papa jack says

    santa may suspect that astid has everything else in the world, asking for a scale—–even i am a little suspect—and elmo is the best sister ever—–love you

  8. says

    So sweet and tender. What a great big sis. Jack figured it out at around 4 or 5 and promptly ruined it for Margaret as soon as she was old enough to listen. We never got to experience the Santa magic. I still write Santa on some packages, though.xo
    anna whiston-donaldson recently posted..Tree-dition Rocks

  9. says

    My dear friend you certainly have generated a lot of tears today. All of your girls are beautiful, both on the outside AND the inside (the most important part, after all).

    Do they have that dress in my size? As I feel the need to be a princess too.

  10. says

    I also wanted to say I hope Santa remembers the scale because she may never ask for one again! I still can’t get over how adorable she looks:)

  11. says

    I know that Gio and Jacob will believe well after they don’t, if you know what I mean.
    I still believe in Santa and Magic, I still believe because of children like Astrid, Esther and Eloise.
    I still believe because I’ve seen magic happen in my life almost every day of it…even when times are tough and I am hopeless, the magic shows up in small moments.

    I know that their good hearts come naturally from you, and that makes the magic even more real.

    she and her doll baby look gorgeous.

  12. says

    Two years ago we were driving when Cady said, “Mom, some of the kids at school said Santa isn’t real, but he is… right?” “Do you believe he is?” “Yes.” “Good. Me too.”

    I dropped her off and called my best friend bawling. I was so upset that we were getting closer and closer. I think we’ve reached the age where she is starting to doubt, but the wanting to believe keeps her believing. I hope this stage lasts for awhile.
    Jennifer recently posted..Smile It Forward with Tylenol

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