New Direction

Eloise is mad at me. I was talking about her last night, in front of her, and I was actually telling a story about something she did that I was PROUD of…but it didn’t matter. Eloise doesn’t like to be the center of attention – good or bad, and she’s sick of reminding me that I should never talk about her.


Kids don’t understand how difficult that is to do.


So, I’ve decided to blog about her. Ha! Kidding. She’s told me that I cannot blog about her either. Which I know until she’s in her mid-20s or so, she won’t understand my need to blog about the little stories in our lives. Because it’s not just about her, what she does, what they do, what I do, touches all of us. It’s all of our stories melded together that create a family.


So I currently call ownership.

But to try to give Eloise some privacy, instead I’d like to talk about her while talking about Ohio. Specifically drivers from Ohio.


Before I get started though, I’d like you to take a little driving quiz:

Question: The left lane of a freeway is for…

A. Driving at any speed you would like – especially below the speed limit! And you can drive in this lane even if you are not actively passing anyone on the right, and it’s especially fun to drive in the left lane when you have a line of 20 cars behind you because they can’t get around you because you’ve decided to drive the exact speed of the car on your right. Bonus points for slowing down below the speed limit so people actually have to pass you on the right, but then right when they almost have enough room to sneak around in front of you, you then speed up so they cannot pass.

B. Actively passing vehicles in the right line. Slower traffic is to keep right.


I love you Ohio, but OMG really, THE ANSWER IS NOT ‘A!” Why are you all in the left lane? So, for the three and half hours that I drove through Ohio on Sunday, I ‘may’ have just used every swear word that I know about 5000 times. Basically I just said “What the F%$#” the whole time through Ohio. At one point I even had to play Carol King to try to relax my mind.



So, for three and half hours Eloise told me to watch my language. I told her that from now on, Ohio gives me a free pass to swear and even she can swear and I won’t get mad because OMFG OHIO DRIVERS!!!!



If you want to read more about Eloise(but don’t tell her that I sent you..because shhh, I don’t talk about her), I’d love for you to read my piece on Mamalode this week. I wrote about our goodbyes as she left for camp, and maybe to let you all know – those of you in those toddler and preschool trenches which kids who are separating from you for the first time and IT’S HARD and you truly believe you’ll have to attend the prom with them…well, it does get better.


About Tracy

My name is Tracy Morrison and I live in sunny Minnesota. I'm neither British nor a nun - I'm just a Midwesterner with a headache. This is mainly a humor and lifestyle blog that documents the lighter side of parenting. I am an ex-corporate ladder climber turned freelance writer, social media manager, and fashion expert - and ruler of my own little universe(very small). Aren't we all. I would love for you to contact me at

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  1. says

    I love you. And I love your girls. And my oldest no longer wants to be “referred to” on the blog anymore either. It’s okay; I’ve got two others. Separately, I am unable to leave the far right lane anymore. I just don’t have it in me to go beyond the speed limit. But I won’t get in the lanes that do and then keep you there, under my safe 55.
    Arnebya recently posted..Guest Posting at Things I Can’t Say

  2. Donnamay says

    Oh its not just Ohio. In Montana, where the speed limit is 75 – on ONE-LANE highways no less – no one drives over 60! WTF?

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