Astrid had her first preschool parent-teacher conference last week. What I have found out so far is that the majority of the kids in her class are first-borns. I gather this because most of these moms seem to have newborn babies and most of these moms are about 14 years younger than I am. Needless to say I haven’t really met anyone yet and I just overhear some of the conversations as they meet and most of the conversations go “OMG I graduated from the school in 2006 too!” And I am like OMG I graduated before you were born so I am just going to sit her quietly and pick my yellowing teeth.
Astrid isn’t fairing much better than I am. In fact if you ask her what some of her classmates names are she answers with “I don’t have classmates” or “there are no other kids in my class” or “I like to play by myself.”
So she’ll be lonely too in about 40 years.
I think the most uncomfortable part of the whole preschool situation though is that neither of us know any of her five teachers names. I mean I am sure they told me what they were when we toured, but I’ll be damned if I can remember. So for now I just call them “Hi” “Good morning” and “How are you today!” It’s working for me. I wonder if Astrid calls them “You” “You there” and “You the only lady with short hair.” Whatever works.
But I do have to giggle that I am dropping Astrid off at a place where I don’t know who anybody is.
But she seems happy as long as the other kids keep on the down-low and don’t invade her space because she prefers preschool completely alone.
Because the information from her conference was actually quite surprising for me to hear. You see, she has two sisters whose preschool conferences always started with “They need to be more assertive.” And I would say “No, no they don’t.” So here’s the thing about my kids – and believe me this is nothing I taught or did or instructed or disciplined or anything – my kids even as babies, toddlers, preschooler and now beyond have NEVER(no exaggeration) taken a toy or anything from another child and if a child wants something that they are playing with, well they will just hand it to that child and then find something else to play with. Every time. No exaggeration. Always. All of them. So as you can imagine my girls have NEVER gotten into a fight. Ever. Because I do believe since birth they care more about people than stuff and if you came over here right now and said you wanted everything they owned they would just help you load it up and haul it away and then shrug their shoulders and say “Oh well, we can find something else.”
So I need to repeat that – my kids have never fought.
Back to the surprise of the conference – her teacher said that Astrid is being assertive at school, and while she would still never have interest in what another child is playing with, she holds firm if another child just tries to take her toy. And I about died when I heard this news and wasn’t even sure what to do with it.
But the first thing I did was warn her sisters that they are pretty much going to get their asses kicked when Astrid gets bigger.
*****
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My first two were the same as yours. My 3rd is totally going to kick their asses. He already the bully here, we are so screwed.
Kimberly recently posted..Her Wrath
I know – I already say “Watch out for Astrid!!” and they start running away. lol
Oh, third kid. My girls do fight, but their little sister definitely doesn’t take any shit.
Bad.Ass. Love her.
Take care of my son’s future wife, okay?
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He better watch-out! xo
Good for her. I like her attitude already. As for the teacher name thing, yeah they are way to quick about that – I totally get them confused from each other, but they all seem nice so I keep on dropping my kids off there.
Kiran
Kiran@masalachica recently posted..Once Upon a Time
LOL – glad it’s not just me. I was just saying that to my mom – “I don’t know who they are but they all seem really nice so I’m sure it’s just fine.”
Good for her. I am convinced that H was put on this earth to give her sister a run for her money. She holds her ground too. She does things when asked, and has already put herself on time out, but she defends her territory.
She is also funny and super affectionate. She greets everyone with a hug. She spent this morning when I dropped her off hugging one of the preschool teachers repeatedly. (made her day clearly)
I just sucked it up and admitted to the teachers I couldn’t remember their names. Now I’m on my second run through the staff so I remember most of them.
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I know – I should just ask what their names are…maybe…
Hayden is just like that. When he was younger, he would gladly give up a toy that deal with confrontation. He has grown out of this a little but not much.
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My oldest was like that — no confronation. Sunny disposition, laid back, the whatever girl. The second girl was the same until school started. She was definitely more assertive but she’d still give the toy if asked (not if it was taken, though. Then she’d scream). This boy? Oh, this boy is a boy of an entirely different makeup. First, he was docile like his sisters but even before school I noticed it: the ability to pick up something and clock the living shit out of your head and not think twice about it. We’re working on that.
I love the little surprises at conferences. I am not being sarcastic. I like finding out things about my kids that are different from my perception of them — helps keep my eyes open and not be jaded by only what I see. But I know damn well I’ma warn them about the boy’s propensity to throw wooden blocks, aiming for heads.
Arnebya recently posted..Sometimes the World and I Don’t Get Along
I’ll keep it in mind to duck if I ever come over to your home.
And yes, I love the little surprises at conferences too. xo
it’s totally a youngest thing…Brooke is so sassy…she’ll actually push another kid down to take their toy, and she’ll be damned if you try to take something from her…
and because everyone is so happy that she’s not that stereotypical well behaved kid with Ds they just let her do whatever she wants…
Great…
And I think Astrid is my favorite kid of yours
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You can borrow Astrid on Sundays. xoxo
it is so true that each kid is different! it will be interesting as she grows up to see how else she differs from the big sisters!
Mo @ The Baby Is Fine recently posted..Blistering Heat, Freezing Cold, and Hurricane Sandy
I wish my kids had more of your elder two girls in them. I think it’s because they’re so close in age, and therefore interested in much of the same things, but they’re always demanding what the other one has.
From my side, it sucks.
Among other children, they do look out for each other (I, truly, pity Leila’s first few boyfriends, because CJ, who is already a bit of a bruiser, is going to insist he chaperone), but the “no touch, mine” is big…and perhaps too big.
John recently posted..Where I think about life as a professional musician
My brother and I are 10 months apart and while we may have beat the shit out of each other..I still knew he was my biggest protector. xo
THAT’S what happens with the youngest.
I know, I know.
My first was an easy kid to raise, second was quiet and went with the flow.
And Mr. #3 –the last baby who grabbed hold of my heart on his way out? Well, with the spoiling and the coddling and protecting what’s his and wanting to be one of the big boys?
HOLY COW.
I walk in your shoes, lady. (well, yours are fashionable, mine are my oldest’s tennies from last year, but, still, you know what I mean.)
x0
Alexandra recently posted..Red Flags, Cont. He Finds Me
I love this! (Although I can’t believe your first two never fought. You lucky duck, you. Mine, could be worse, but man-oh-man they can go at it too.)
Astrid, she is just great. I love her spunk.
christine recently posted..A Note From My Sister
Astrid is clearly a warrior!
I agree. It’s a third child thing. God bless the soul of the person who tries to take the last piece of pizza in this house. My youngest will always make sure she gets her share.
Shannon recently posted..Smiling with Deepak
Oh sweet Astrid! Love this, love you! xo
Galit Breen recently posted..Let’s Talk About Chutzpah
She is seriously so cute. Dylan is a ground-stander, too, which is funny since Abbey never was.
angela recently posted..I Know This Place
Yeah I get the feeling that Bella’s gonna kick Ben’s ass. They have very different personalities. Ben being much more passive.
It sucks either way, people used to always think I was Ben’s nanny. It was lovely. That or they thought I was much older than I was.
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People assume I’m at least 8 years younger than I truly am because my oldest is in K.
Maybe at least one of the other moms from Astrid’s class had kids late in life, and is just dying for some adult conversation (in the midst of the din of her three children’s cries of “Mine! I had it first!” And the sounds of them trying to beat each other without getting caught).
I know – I hope to find some mom friends in her class this year. xo
Uh yeah – I don’t think she’s even going to get much bigger before that even happens. Love your girls in all their differences.
Lady Jennie recently posted..Autumn Glory
My kids fight every day of life. I feel confident in the fact that they will never get their asses kicked by anyone, anywhere, ever thanks to their brothers teaching them to take a punch. I don’t know, I try looking on the bright side. My oldest was the same as Astrid in preschool. No friends, couldn’t name a soul, nothing. He’s pretty popular in 5th grade despite his continued awkwardness. #2? Also the same. He wouldn’t even speak to anyone for his first full year. Now? In 2nd grade? Same. He has 2 friends and he only plays with them. He says it’s all he needs because they are the best. Astrid will be awesome, clearly she already is!
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