1. Go early to avoid the lines at the Little Hands Farm. Nobody wants a scene when little Tommy and little Susie fight over the apple or throw a fit waiting for the little tractors.
2. Buy the honey taffy at the Ag building. Keeping feeding taffy to children all day. The more taffy in their mouth, the less they can complain about the heat or the stink or that they are tired. Keep their mouths busy.
3. And if you run out of taffy – just keep buying things on a stick – Giant Pickles! Pronto Pups! Chocolate covered bacon!
4. Then buy the $1 refillable cup of milk. Stand there for two hours drinking milk. Then stand outside the restroom for the next 2 hours and see – you’re now ready to go home!
5. Avoid the Miracle of Birth barn if your children are between the ages of 8-11 and you really haven’t had ‘the talk’ with them because what was a very sweet barn with wittle baby animals is now a realization that something could one day come out of their body and OMG GROSS.(Side-note, Eloise and I sat outside this barn during this trip while Esther and Astrid looked at the cute babies being born. Eloise has not yet recovered)
6. Bring 10 pounds of antibacterial wipes and gel. And still your children’s hands will never seem clean. They also work great on armpits.
7. Be prepared that once your kids reach the age of 7 all they pretty much want to do is head for the Midway. So bring about $150 more than you usually do because that’s about how much the rides and games cost that your kid will sucker you into buying for them. But win/win – all three kids walked away with a 75 cent stuffed animal to bring home!!!
8. Bring an extra large stroller to just hold the 16 different ‘hats’ that you will get during the fair – the foam moose hat, the paper corn cob hat, the chicken hat. Enjoy throwing them all away when you get home.
9. Forget to warm your city kids that animals POOP – and watch at least one of them walk right through cow manure.
10. Watch and smile as your kids enjoy every single dirty, stinky moment of the State Fair because immediately after we leave- they start planning what they want to see next year.
Thank you Minnesota State Fair for another great get-together!!