Better Than A Beaver Story

She’s already proven that she can’t be trusted at Starbucks.  The nerve – sharing beaver stories with the baristas.

Now we cannot go shopping to any stores ever again. Or perhaps we will just stay home until she’s 13.

I mean it’s bad enough when you’re in a dressing room at Anthropologie and your two year old is saying very LOUDLY  “Mom, why do you have a fuzzy butt?” (and you realize that you shouldn’t wear string thongs without a full Brazilian), but it’s also the “Mom, why is your tummy so squishy like my bear’s tummy?” and “Mom, what are these marks on your thighs?” and “Mom, why are your ‘nickels’ bigger than mine and shaky?” and “Mom, why is that wrinkly?”

And you wonder where our body self-confidence has gone? Well completely out the window when you have a toddler pointing out every little flaw and flab you have and announcing it over the PA system to all of the hot 22 year olds shopping at Anthro.

Two year olds are loud.

But my favorite thing that Astrid said this week was when we were at the bank and she said to the teller in a voice loud enough that it carried to Egypt  “You know when I grow bigger I’m going to have a string hanging out of my butt just like my mommy does.!!!! Won’t that be fun!!!”

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