Sometimes I think we make parenting decisions for very arbitrary reasons.
Because we can. Because we are their parents and even if the rules seem crazy. Who cares.
They are usually too young to question it. And we can just use that powerful comeback when they do “BECAUSE I SAID SO!”
Anyway, when Eloise was in first grade I let her go to a Harry Potter movie with a friend and she came home and had nightmares for months so I told her “no Harry Potter books or movies until at least third grade!”
So because she is a first born and a rule follower she never even mentioned Harry Potter again until this year…when her first grade sister brought home Harry Potter checked out from the school library..and I let her first grade sister read it.
And then she was kind of like “WTF?!?”
It was then that I realized no matter how much you try to make things ‘fair’ for siblings that they will never be ‘fair’ and that the firstborn has to deal with some really stupid rules that you will let the second child break and by the time the third child is that age they will have no rules or you will be too old to care.
Anyway, all Harry Potter books have been read and movies have been watched. Amen. Even Astrid now knows he is, to which I say “WTF?!?”
So when I bought and read The Hunger Games last week I just threw it over to my nine year old Eloise to read and she was done in about three hours. SHE LOVED IT.
And I’m okay with it. The first book has no sex and no bad language. It does have violence but I don’t consider it ‘bad violence’ as in it’s not a sick person killing people for no reason. I think the book has some compelling lessons of strategy, trust, love and survival while using some very current day themes of war, the haves and have-nots, and most of all our addiction to reality TV. …cue the Dance Moms music here…
And can I just say actually reading and discussing a book with a mature topic with my daughter put me in a happy place that I cannot even describe.
It makes reading Goodnight Moon to her 17,865 times now totally worth it.
******
So how about you? The Hunger Games and a nine year old..crazy or perfectly fine?
..and now the big decision…can she handle the movie….
Yup, the older kids always get the short end of the stick with no you can’t do that now etc, while the younger ones do it anyway at that age.
I haven’t read the Hunger Games (yeah I know!), but you know you’re like my parenting idol so if you say aye, it’s aye, yo.
Well you must read them NOW…before your toddler does.
First, I’m a third kid, and my sister (firstborn) was hell bent on making sure my mom stuck to at least some of the main rules, like no makeup until age 13. I think by then my mom would’ve let some of it go otherwise!
For the book, I think it totally depends on the kid, and obviously she could handle it. I had the same feeling about the first one as you anyway, and haven’t even blinked that my 3rd-5th grade students have read it. As for the movie, I vote for seeing it yourself first before deciding. I think there can be a big difference between skimming over or not exactly visualizing the violence while they read and having it right there on a huge screen where your brain can’t help but have the image burned onto it. The movie may deal with it in a way that won’t give her nightmares. Or that last death in the games could be unbelievably terrifying and brutal. Hard to say without seeing it (which I’ll be doing as a moms’ night out, since my munchkins are definitely too small for it)!
I totally agree with seeing the movie first..and what a great opportunity for me to perhaps see it twice! Thank you for your thoughts. xo
I totally agree. I have seen the movie and this could convince my mom to let me read the book! I am 9 too.
Hunger Games, Harry Potter: Same-same, right?
*Gulp*
I haven’t even considered Kayli wanting to read this, but I suppose that’s next?
On another note: Yay for the movie! i can’t wait!
Kind of the same..but I loved this so much more than HP.
My 11 year olds brought it home from school and read it to me. We cried together and then I was the one who had nightmares…same with Marley and Me
LOL – that is so me.
My problem is not letting 9 year olds read it – my problem is that
1) it was selected to be our campus-wide reading (everyone is required to read it, teachers, students, staff) AT A UNIVERSITY. Really? Could we possibly lower our reading/writing bar any further?!
2) Teachers protested it – not because it wasn’t grown-up enough or highbrow or complex enough but because it was TOO adult. They protested the selection of a high-school (if that) reading level book because it was TOO violent and grown up. MY GOD
Oh my word. I consider it total beach/airplane mindless reading. ..and NOT that adult at all. Hilarious. Also, I’m sorry. lol
From what I know of your girl, from your writing here, she seems a little mature beyond her years, yes? I think it honestly depends on the child, is what I am trying to say. My almost 8 year old is up to the 4th Harry Potter and I’m good with it… I think…
I don’t have a problem with Eloise reading the book at all; she seems to be mature, and you’re obviously talking about it with her.
I’d screen the movie first. (Is that a doh! comment? I don’t know. Abbey is 4.) I am slightly concerned, for myself, about the horn and the dogs. Shudder.
Thank you for letting her be my guinea pig. I was thinking about getting it for John to read for two reasons. 1. he would love it and 2, I want to know what it’s about but I won’t go as far as to read an actual book.
Happy Monday!
m.
I know. A book. Don’t tell anyone that I was reading books instead of blogs. shhhh
I let my 9 year old read it. It doesn’t seem to have scarred her.
We had Harry Potter issues when it first came out. I read the book & then let our 4th grader read it. End of story – he didn’t become obsessed with HP! As for the Hunger Games we only let 4th & 5th graders check it out in our elementary school library. It totally depends on the maturity of your child. I’m sure Eloise will do just fine reading the trilogy. You are a great Mom and keep trusting your instincts
I cannot judge as I have not read them.
If you think she’s not too young, that’s all that matters. 3 hours? That is impressive.
I know. She brought and finished 9 books during our Spring Break. All big ones. Most I’ve never read. Also I can’t do her math homework. I hope to god she gets a job soon so she can support me.
As the previous commenter stated, only you can know for sure. My oldest will be nine this year bit he’s very tender hearted, so I won’t be letting him read The Hunger Games yet, though he’s read all the Harry Potter series.
I am pretty much up for letting kids read whatever they want, within reason (i.e. Fifty Shades of Grey – no). And it also totally depends on the kid. Some have nightmares from Scooby-Doo, some think watching a crocodile necropsy is cool.
I started reading H.P. with my son last summer (between 1st & 2nd grade) and we’re on #2 now. I always thought of YA lit as the stuff you read in elementary & middle school. By middle school I was on Stephen King and Tom Clancy, not “kid books.”
That being said, my Hubby & I both read H.G. and we are dying to see the movie.
Any kid with a book in hand is a good thing. You have an amazing little reader — you must be so proud!
Yes, like I am saving my old well-read copies of Judy Blume’s Forever and Wifey for her junior high years. Oh god.
I LOVED Stephen King when I was in junior high. Now it scares that crap out of me.
I just want to raise readers. That is all. Regardless of what they read I want them to love it the way I do.
When I was nannying for J, he read all of the HP books, including the final 1 when he was 8 or so. He handled them wonderfully, and it was only about a year before he started The Hunger Games (which was new then!).
It’s all about what your kid can handle, and what you’re willing to discuss with them.
With the book, I would probably warn the kid (which probably would make him/her want to read it all the more) and prepare for a late-night visit. Would probably screen the movie first. But for the most part, I really am just glad when my kids want to read! I have 2 voracious readers and 1 non-reader (and 2 pre-literates), and the 2 readers are having a MUCH easier time in school.
Charlie and all of his friends read them when they came out, he kept telling me I needed to read them and I finally did, I am on the second one now and they are very addicting. We are planning to see the movie together, he said he would go with me before he goes with his friends! I am beaming….it’s nice to have something to share with a 14 year old boy.
But I agree with some other commenters, since she is 9 I would screen the movie first, no telling how they are going to translate all of that violence and horror to the big screen.
Well you and Charlie can do a pre-screening for me this week as I know I probably won’t get to the movie for awhile. I trust you.
I think it largely depends on the particular reader. Some kids are capable of understanding a particular book at an earlier age. Common Sense Media is a wonderful resource for when you’re wondering about whether a book is appropriate or not – in case you don’t want to/can’t read it first. I’m letting my 12 year old see the movie at the midnight premiere, since she’s read the book many times and fine with it, but waiting for the younger daughters, who are more sensitive to violence.
Thank you for that resource!
Most 9 year olds, I’d argue, are not ready to read The Hunger Games. Eloise, I’d argue, could read whatever the heck she wants — she just seems to be that kind of girl, she knows what’s right for her, and what isn’t . . . and, even if she were to stumble upon something that was a bit over her maturity level (which, I believe, is akin to most 72 year olds), she’d come to you and ask about it, rather than try to come up with answers on her own, which is the behavior I’ll pray for, when I have kids Eloise’s age.
You are not suppose to make me cry with your incredibly kind comment. xoxo
I’ve been a big fan of The Hunger Games since it came out. I’ve also met Suzanne Collins and she is very thoughtful and smart. She wrote this book very intentionally.
As for a nine year old reading it, I think it totally depends on the child. Your daughter, who is mature beyond her years, can definitely handle it! And did.
This book (and series) is half adventure and half philosophy. And as you say, it totally relates to our world today.
It’s awesome and I’m glad she read it!
I’d see the movie first, before deciding if she should go. You never know how books are portrayed. Although, I’ve heard this movie is done very well.
I love hearing this about Suzanne. The book feels so intention. I love it so much.
I would comment but *gasp* no one at the Bungalow has read The Hunger Games yet…. The rock we live under is very very big.
xo,
Dana
Now this is shocking to me. You will have to buy the trilogy for your Hawaiian vacation!
I think it totally depends on the kid and how well the parent knows the kids.
I see no problem with letting kids read books like the Hunger Games or Harry Potter as long as the parents are there to answer questions and discuss it.
My son (5) has seen all the Harry Potter movies. I think it depends on the kid (and well the parents) He was never scared and he loved them. I read and loved the Hunger Games and am slightly obsessed with them now. Midnight showing on Thursday??? If he was 9 and interested in them I’m sure I would let him read them.
Are you going at midnight? I’m not sure if I have that in me anymore. lol
I don’t know if I do either, but I really want to. Problem is my only option currently is to see it with a friend … in ROGERS. That’s practically the end of the universe at 2:30am.
Hi Tracy,
Yes, I would probably let my nine-year-old read The Hunger Games. I loved the books. I have bought my ticket for the movie on Friday night!
Love,
Your Utah Friend,
Tina
Oh I knew you would be first in line..such a movie buff. Cannot wait to hear what you think!
I remember when my kids were nine (in 4th grade) a lot of their friends were reading the Twilight series (pretty much, I think, to be cool).
Neither Jack nor Karly were interested so I didn’t have to struggle with the decision. Hooray! With The Hunger Games, they were 12 and 14 so it was also not an issue; they wanted to read the series, I let them.
They. Loved. All. Three.
Here’s why I love that they read/loved the series:
The heroine is strong, brave, SMART, loyal; more so even than the boys. (Unlike, say, Bella Swan who is clutzy and victimized and in constant need of rescuing.)
I’m not calling out anyone who loved Twilight, I’m just saying that a young lady who loves to read will gain a lot more strength and wisdom and a far better role model in the HG series than in Twilight. Ahem.
I’m taking my kids to the midnight showing of the movie in a few days and I can’t wait.
p.s. So far, the “young” people I know who have read the book seem unfazed by the death; whereas my husband is far more disturbed that these are children being sacrificed by adults. It’s interesting, the level of “understanding” that readers of different ages bring to the book. I had to remind Bill it’s not real.
Bella is such a HORRIBLE character. OMG I just wanted someone to kill her in the first book so the series could improve.
Love your insight on this trilogy. Katniss rocks. Also I need to get a cat and name her Katniss.
Also – I want to fly out and join you at the movies!
xo
we know that Brooke is a lost cause…
candy for breakfast, whatever she wants to watch or read…
taking the car for a joyride at age 10…whatever, we’re so over it
I agree w/other commenters that you might consider previewing the movie or asking around once it’s out before you let her see it. Or, just see it together and have some answers prepared. Hell, if nothing else, it’ll be a new conversation starter. I think, though, that what you’ve written about Eloise proves she can handle the book and you go w/your gut on your kid, so you don’t really need us to bolster your choices, right?
) My girls are reading it together. They’re 11 and 8 (the 8 yr old isn’t really interested, though; she just doesn’t want to be left out).
I felt like you when my oldest wanted to see The Help. I shall hereby now out myself as potentially the only black person in the history of peoples black who did NOT like that book. And who has not seen the movie (as I duck the shoe someone just threw; check your aim, heifer; I gots mad reflexes, yo). I let her see it with her aunt b/c I’d read the book and figured there wouldn’t be THAT much variation between novel and screenplay. I doubt they’ll want to stray too far from The Hunger Games’ story too.
LOL. So did she like The Help? Also, I’m sure you are not alone in your feelings about that book.
My two oldest boys are 12, and 10. They are AVID readers. My oldest is very tender hearted and my 10 year old is not phased by much. I held off on letting read them because I was worried about my oldest. My 10 year old read her other series, Gregor the Overlander last year and loved it (I highly reccomend it, and they are selling the series at Costco right now). I let my mom buy the H.G. series for them for Christmas. They were both finished with it before school was back in. They enjoyed it so much.
As for the movie, my hubby and I will see it first then decide. I just love that they love reading so much.
She and Noah can start a book club. He started it yesterday.
Oh I bet he will love it! The book club is a fabulous idea.
Ah, the plight of the oldest. I’m sure my sister could commiserate with Eloise.
I have yet to read The Hunger Games. (Shh, don’t tell.) But I have a feeling that what I allow my girls to read and watch will depend a lot on their personalities. (Hope is still afraid of the witch on Dora…)
Haven’t read it. Still lamenting wasting those hours reading the ridiculously awful Twilight sage. OMG.
I hope to someday discuss books with my kids. Two of whom read just fine – except they have no interest in reading books whatsoever.
Mostly to spite me, right?
It’s totally to spite you. Oh these are SOOOO much better than Twilight. You must read. Now.
Oh geez, I’m the worst at this. It gets hard when your child reads years above their grade level and you run out of things to have them read based on their ability. Plus you really want to share a great book with them like Hunger Games.
And hubby is even worse then me…like the time he took my 3 and 5 year old to see a dinosaur movie. I was at the grocery store oblivious to the whole thing. That dinosaur movie turned out to be Jurasic Park. Now you know why my kids are so ridiculous!
Even I was scared of Jurasic Park. lol
I think this is great. Better her imagination be captured by a book you think is questionable than stifled by something boring.
I vividly remember the first book my mother made me wait to read. It was “Gone with the Wind.” I had to wait until third grade.
And I turned out…. fine…. mostly.
Every parent and every kid is different. You gotta do what works for you and yours. I think anything that makes kids think is a good thing.
My 11 year old devoured all three books – she loved them. I totally would have let her read them at 9. I’m taking her to the m
Oh I cannot wait to hear your review!!
I haven’t read The Hunger Games and am frankly a little bemused by all the hype – as if I’m missing out on being a part of something very, very cool and hip, which, if I’m being honest, is really nothing new for me.
That said, I had a girlfriend tell me essentially the same thing you said here – that the book contained some really good messages and role models. OTOH, my educator husband is reading it right now and said just the other night, “No way would I let my 3rd grade daughter read this!”
So. I guess it just comes down to a matter of personal perspective in the end.
I’ve not read the book, but I do know that when we grew up, we were not as sheltered as we are with our kids now. No 24 hour cartoon, animated TV. I had to watch Mash for heaven sakes in the afternoon or a soap or there would be nothing on TV.
I saw Grease. A lot of it was over my head, but….I still saw it.
My mind tells me not to censor my 10 year old’s reading because censorship is “wrong”. I know I read books that were “too violent” or “too mature” for my age at times and am no worse for the wear, and I think there is something to be said for “self-censorship” – a child reading a book and deciding she really isn’t interested in it, or it is too scary, or it is too over her head, and putting it down to stop reading it. Elise has read several books that I have read, but I’m not sure if I would hand over Hunger Games. My mind says yes, but the mom in me isn’t sure!
As for Eloise, I think it is fine. If she loved it, then great! I’ll have to think about this more. My kids were both scared of Harry Potter though, so they may be sort of wimpy.
My eight year old just finished the first one earlier this week. We have had a lot of good conversations about it. I have been called a terrible mother by more than one person for letting her read it. But I thought she was ready. And she proved it by not only reading it all the way through (meaning she was interested in it), but by also really picking up on the themes.
Every kid is different, and it isn’t something for every eight or nine year old to read. But for my kid (and your kid) it was.
I haven’t decided about the movie yet. I think I’ll see it first. There is a big difference between reading something and seeing it on a big screen.
So there’s kids that clearly know fiction from non-fiction… those kids are fine reading whatever. Then there’s kids that still believe part of fiction might come true in real life and well, they might get scared by certain stories.
Both my girls fall into the first category. I think Grace was done with Harry Potter before she turned 9. She saw all the movies and was fine. Erina just finished the third book of the Hunger Games series and is thrilled to see the movie. I actually offered to let her go with friends (without me), but she said non of her friends read it (she’s 12, I thought it would be wildly popular with this age group???). Grace is planning to read them after she finishes the “Seeker” series (have your girls read those… bizarre story about bears??).
Anyways, I think it’s very hard to find age appropriate books when your kids read way above grade level.
Perfectly fine. I would have read it at 9.
Totally fine! In my humble opinion. Every kid is different and they are all developing at different rates. My kid loved the book and her good friend wouldn’t go near it with a ten foot pole. And boy, I’m with you, how great is it to be able to discuss something we both enjoy.
I think depending on the kid, the books & movies are fine.
There is no sex in the whole trilogy, if I remember correctly.
The violence in the movie is graphic, but not gratuitous. They’re fighting. District is known to be ruthless. There’s no way to sugar coat it.
Rue’s death was also done excellent, IMO.
Amen. If your kid is mature enough to deal with it, have at it, and really, we all should be by the time we reach 11. She has to read 4 Holocaust books this year, which is far more gruesome than The Hunger Games – a fictional novel – ever will be.
My oldest read this in 5th grade when she was 10, and then finished the trilogy that summer after having turned 11. I did not read it before, nor did I feel that I needed to. We did discuss the topics, and then I read them all on the plane to some work trip, and we talked about them. Fun and easy reading, good story, grounded morals and principles. She also read The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings trilogy, so asking her not to read The Hunger Games seemed a bit ridiculous.
Bonus: A reason for a mom and daughter date to a packed theater with both of my younger sisters and cousins.
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Isabel just asked if she can read it. How is Eloise faring a week out? I’m too sleep-deprived to make any decisions!
She still LOVED it and we are on book #2. We are going to the movie this weekend. Several of her friends from school have already seen it.
It’s a great book and a great movie. The violence might be a little much though… I do have the second and third if she wants to borrow them!
I am shocked at peoples ambivalence to letting there kids read these books. Put the violence aside and there is still drug abuse, bulimia, and suicide. These three a lone should be enough to horrify any parent. Why would you purposefully give kids these ideas? Especially in a positive light.
- very concerned
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