It’s so typical these days. Astrid sits on her little pink potty. I sit on mine since I’m in there anyway. However mine is not little nor pink. Which kind of sucks.
Her knees almost touch my shins because our bathroom is so small. She smiles at me and says “you hear that mommy?” as her pee hits the plastic potty. “Mommy I’m making yellow pee!” she yells. “What are you making today, Mommy? Yellow pee or brown poop?”
Sometimes I find myself sitting alone in the bathroom. For two seconds until the knocks happen. “Mom, where is my pink headband?” “Mom, can you find the good glue for this craft?” “Mom, where is my homework folder?”
And then they crack-open the door a bit “Mom, can I call a friend to come over?” “Mom, come play with me!” “Mom, I cannot find this matching sock.” “Mom, did you buy bread?”
“Honey, where are my keys?”
Moments later I emerge and say “Eloise, I’m getting in a shower. You are in charge for these ten minutes. You can cook, you can clean, you can work the TV, you can do just about anything but drive…NO ONE TALKS TO ME FOR TEN MINUTES UNLESS THERE IS FIRE OR BLOOD!!”
Hot water running down my body. For 15 seconds. The voices are outside the door at first…
“Mom, can we make toast with Nutella?” Mom, the pencil sharpener is broken.”
The door cracks open. I feel the cool air.
“Mom, can you straighten my hair?” “Mom, can you sew the waistband in on these pants?
The shower curtain gets pushed aside. I scream “WHAT, WHAT – JUST TEN MINUTES! THAT IS ALL I ASK FOR! ”
“Sorry Mom, but have you seen my red marker?”
I get that kids need to tell/ask/say/yell/blurt everything as it comes to mind.
Don’t we all?
So maybe it would be easier if we all just pooped and showered together from now on.
We’ll need a bigger bathroom.