This will be the last time I talk about BlogHer…

I’ve been on a post-BlogHer love fest the past 48 hours. My outgoing twitter stream is filled with “OMG you are the best!” “Meeting you was my conference highlight!” “You are so damn gorgeous I kind of hate you!” “Where do you live so I can continue to stalk you!” “You are the best brand of ____ ever, pay me big money to write about you!” “Did BlogHer make my ass look big?” “Please tell me that nobody has pictures of me dancing at Sparklecorn!” “Does anyone remember Sparklecorn?”

(Hanging with the lovely Kate and Tracy)

I totally forgive you for unfollowing me today. I forgive you for tweeting about your dog. And poop. And sleep. And what you ate for lunch. Like totally. Kind of. Also you can read my BlogHer recap post here.

Also, a note to the grandparents – I promise to take cute kid pictures soon. I’m still trying to find my kids. They grew and I don’t recognize them. Also they are sticky. My BlogHer friends were not sticky.

In the meantime – here are my Top 10 BlogHer Conference Tips for Newbies:

10.  Wear what you are comfortable in. I like fashion. I wear fashion. I also wear Spanx and couldn’t eat for three days. I also wear wedges and now cannot walk after dancing at Sparklecorn in 4″ heels. There were ladies in jeans and there were ladies in evening dresses. Be yourself.

9. If you must eat – which ask my new friend Tracy as I was queen of the “where in the hell is the food” – take time to have a light dinner before you go out. Trust me on this one. The food at the parties is not real food and is usually not plentiful and it is impossible to balance a drink, your plate, your purse, your swag bag, your business cards and shake hands and hug people with all of that going on.  No one wants to spill their nachos on Scary Mommy.

8.  Make a plan before you go to BlogHer. I spent A LOT of time in the weeks leading up to BlogHer making plans and appointments and getting party inviations and connecting with the Bloggers I love so we could actually hangout at BlogHer. Get a facebook chat page or Skype or just get their cell phone numbers.  Texting was a godsend during the conference.  By doing this upfront work -I never felt isolated or alone while at BlogHer. I always knew I could find someone from my group if I needed a back-up, someone to walk with, someone to dine with, or someone to party with.   Find your posse and smother them with love – the payback will be tenfold or more.

7. BUT – with the point above – do not be an island or a clique that cannot be penetrable….There were a few times during the conference I saw someone sitting alone or standing alone on the edge of the dance floor. Sure some people want to be alone – but do not assume that – so go over to them and invite them to dine with you, sit with you, bump and grind to Cee Lo with you. You may just make their day and wouldn’t you want to feel included. Make new friends but keep the old. Girl Scout promise my friends.

6.  If you have a roommate(s) – lay-out clothing ahead of time before going out or going to bed as odds are there will be times you are dressing in the dark as to not disturb your roommate’s beauty rest. A few minutes of pre-planning will make you a more considerate roommate.  I think we had a great system and worked really well together – at least they never yelled to my face about my 5:30 workout wake-ups.

5.  Put yourself out there if you want to meet someone.  I know this is shocking, but The Pioneer Woman may not just come up to you and introduce herself. She might, but maybe not as she can also be shy. I KNOW how intimidating it is to introduce yourself to that “Big Blogger” – but if you really want to meet them, then you must put forth that effort. I know – they seem busy and preoccupied and talking to that other “Big Blogger” – but really – just go be real and introduce yourself. You will never regret it.  Ask them good questions, tell them they look awesome in that dress, that you like their writing, that you stalk their house..whatever you feel comfortable admitting.

4.  If you are in the expo and want to talk to brands and someone else is having a really good conversation with said brand – WAIT YOUR TURN, bitch. Do not interrupt. I rarely get mad, but the pushiness of some at the expo did make my head explode slightly.  Kind of like when I’m talking to another adult and my kids start talking to me – I also stop and turn and say  “please say excuse me if you feel compelled to interrupt but be prepared to wait until I am done.”  Seriously people – do unto others.  Also, it’s just a vibrator.

3.  Don’t use all of your drink tickets. I admit I was slightly nervous with only my 10 drink tickets to use over the course of three nights of parties. So I immediately started stalking pregnant women and Mormons to get more. I quickly ended up with 50 drink tickets. However, even after “buying” many friends drinks over the course of three days- I still came home with 30 unused drink tickets.    There is nothing worse than a sloppy blogger.  Also, my local Starbucks is not accepting these as currency.

(Dancing the night away with Elaine and Tracy – also my sexy duck impression needs work)

2.  Don’t be a swag whore. You don’t need it. Your kids don’t need it. Don’t take it just to take it. It’s wasteful. I came home with a small bag – a few stuffed animals for the kids, some nail polish, gift cards, make-up, chocolate bars, coffee…all things we can use.

1.  Smile. Nothing is more welcoming than a simple smile to someone else. Smiling makes you happier and more relaxed. Laugh often as it’s good for your soul. Compliment others and give lots of hugs. Exude positive energy and more positive energy will find you. Trust me on this one.

What tip do you have for a conference newbie?  Any funny conference mistakes/moments you would like to share?

About Tracy

My name is Tracy Morrison and I live in sunny Minnesota. I'm neither British nor a nun - I'm just a Midwesterner with a headache. This is mainly a humor and lifestyle blog that documents the lighter side of parenting. I am an ex-corporate ladder climber turned freelance writer, social media manager, and fashion expert - and ruler of my own little universe(very small). Aren't we all. I would love for you to contact me at tracy@sellabitmum.com

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