You Spin me Right ‘Round…

Actual conversation with my 7 year old…

Eloise:  Mom, are you coming to my play tomorrow?

Me: Of course, I hope it doesn’t last more than 15 minutes. I wouldn’t miss it.  I am bringing your sisters and we will sit in the front row!

Eloise:  Well, you don’t have to come if you don’t want to.

Me: Of course we are coming. I totally want to come. Please god let Astrid behave.

Eloise:  Well, it is your choice if you want to come or not.

Me: Well I choose to come to your play. I am looking forward to it. Because I am your mom and I don’t have a choice.

Eloise:  Well, if you really do not want to come, I am fine with that.

Me:  Do you not want me to come?I could go to target to buy more designer diapers on clearance instead, but it is so hostile there lately.

Eloise:  You can do anything you want to do.

Me: Well, if you don’t want me there, I can respect that and not come. I think I need an interpreter.

Eloise:  You hate me, you all hate me, nobody wants to come to MY things, MY plays. Nobody cares about me. I can’t believe you aren’t coming to my play!!!!! (hides under bed covers sobbing….)

Me: So, you do want me to come? I think I need a drink.

Eloise:  It is up to you really if you want to come or not.  I really don’t care either way.

Me: Well, I am coming dammit, whether you like it or not. SO THERE!!! (storms out of room, slamming door…) Off to pour vodka.

Eloise:  (yelling through closed door…)FINE – just come then.  But don’t talk to me or do anything embarrassing!!

If this is 7, then what the hell is 12 going to be like???  Lord help me.

About Tracy

My name is Tracy Morrison and I live in sunny Minnesota. I'm neither British nor a nun - I'm just a Midwesterner with a headache. This is mainly a humor and lifestyle blog that documents the lighter side of parenting. I am an ex-corporate ladder climber turned freelance writer, social media manager, world traveler, and marathon runner. I would love for you to contact me at

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  1. says

    Ahh yes, this sounds so familiar with my almost 7 year old. I can’t figure it out ever. And I am so scared for the teenage years! Lord help us. Pretty please with sugar on top!

  2. says

    Oh my! Great post. I love your honesty. Parenting will suck the life right out of you. Feed them good food, make sure they get enough sleep, and just hold on for the ride. Good thing they look like angels when they’re sleeping. :o)
    Rachelle recently posted..The Good- the Bad- and the Ugly

  3. admin says

    I hope to goodness this is a bad as it gets. The drama is crazy. You are right Dana – she needs a positive place of expression!

  4. says

    Now you are scaring me! I have a 2 year old daughter, is this what I have to look forward too? Oh no. I don’t know if I can do it! Well, I did say I was in it for the long haul….
    I am your newest follower from Tag Along Tuesdays!
    I am looking forward to reading more from you, I thought your Eloise post was a riot!
    Melissa recently posted..Oh No!!!

  5. says

    Yep! I have a seven year old girl too and this sounds completely familiar. Boys never did that kind of stuff, girls have to see if they can manipulate the situation. I’ve decided it’s her sport of choice. LOL

    Following from TTA – hope you follow me back. 🙂

  6. Tina M says

    Oh NO!!! Is THIS what I get to look forward to netx year?? My 6 year old is dramatic enough! yikes!!!